It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Fun*Run Time

It's ALREADY that time of year again: The ADAPT Fun*Run for Disability Rights is April 22nd 2012. Maryland's fundraising goal is $8,000 this year. Yes, that's right, $8,000

Donate $1! Donate $10! Donate $100! Donate $1,000! JUST DONATE so we can FREE OUR PEOPLE! I thank you very much for your support!

Monday, July 13, 2009

"I'm Not Embarassed for Who I am..."

I found this video on Terrible Palsy. I had yet to change the URL on my blogroll and was behind reading posts there. I'm glad I finally caught up.

Walk On -- 900 Miles

I'm going to keep my comments about DJ's goal to myself. I get it. I get where he's at. I was there before. I've had similar goals in fact...

The part that gets me, the part that chokes me up, is at about where there are 3mins 45secs left. "If I see myself on television I'll actually look the other way. I won't watch it... All I can say is it's just hard sometimes. It's just hard."

I'm not embarassed for who I am either, but yes, yes it is hard. Writing this I almost want to cry. I'm a bit emotional about something else at the moment and it seems to be putting me over the edge. I've never liked seeing myself on video. It's been a few years though. Maybe next time it won't be so bad.

When I'm not looking at me, when I am me (does that make sense?) I am normal. I am my normal. However, when I'm watching me I am not me, I am outside of me, and the me I am watching is not normal. She is abnormal. The me I am watching looks awkward and unsteady. The me I am does not feel that way. When I was younger if the me I was watching would have been anywhere near the me that I am, I would have gone the other way. It is easy to understand why the me I am watching gets judged by others. I can see how it is so easy to put me into the group that is "them." When I am watching me I almost want to forgive the ableism. After all, they don't know any better.

It's not like I would ever not do something because of the chance I might get on TV. In fact now it's quite the oppisite. I'm an ADAPTer; it's all about breaking down barriers. I think DJ gets that too. He's very well spoken and articulate. Looks can be deceiving. Don't judge a crip by their chair. Or their waddle & cane... We're neither normal nor abnormal. We just are. People are people. I think that's part of his point.

As an aside, why in the world did DJ keep track of his falls on his blog? Anyone else think that's odd?


Anonymous said...

Hey! Whasup? What's going on? haven't heard from ya. we're packing. leave Wednesday back Monday. I have the same feeling when I watch video of me doing anything. I've seen vids of me in court that are totally NOT me. very strange. g

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