It happened suddenly between Wednesday and today, and this time I know exactly what the trigger was. I spent a few hours on Friday night after I got home from work (yes, I work now) writing a very long post on it, but have decided to delay posting it and instead emailed it to my current psychiatrist and my shrink instead, who is being very inconsiderate and decided to go on vacation RIGHT WHEN THIS HIT ME. You know, she's supposed to be clairvoyant and all and see everything coming and cancel her vacation just for me! And in case you're thinking "OMG you're being so inconsiderate, bothering this poor woman while she's out of town," I view it the same as if I left a message on her office voicemail. She's under no obligation to read it now. She'll read it eventually.
It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Fun*Run Time
It's ALREADY that time of year again: The ADAPT Fun*Run for Disability Rights is April 22nd 2012. Maryland's fundraising goal is $8,000 this year. Yes, that's right, $8,000
Donate $1! Donate $10! Donate $100! Donate $1,000! JUST DONATE so we can FREE OUR PEOPLE! http://adaptfunrun.org/runner.php?id=7 I thank you very much for your support!
Monday, August 22, 2011
Anyway, tangent over. Today I woke up and spent the entire day in bed. You know, except for when I had to pee, cuz who wants to lay in a pee soaked bed if they can help it. I took a nap in the evening. I barely ate anything. I didn't bother to take any medication until 4:30. I have quite a few blog posts floating around in my head, such as "No, I'm NOT Into S&M," "I Don't Shave My Legs and I've Decided I Don't Care if You Care," "My New Psychiatrist Refuses to Enter the 21st Century and I'm a Hypocrite" and "One of My Most Embarrassing Moments," which revolves around my period, but I can't figure out why anyone would care about any of this. I also have some back posting I want to do, and a late Freedom Flyer that hasn't even been started.
When it was passed 3:00 and I was still completely naked, I texted a friend and asked her if she could do dinner. I had a cute outfit picked out for the day (my favorite color!) but I couldn't get myself to put it on. I forgot she has a standing 6pm Monday shrink appointment, so we scheduled for tomorrow. she's not doing well either :(
However, I woke up from that evening nap well after 7pm and said, "That's it, you're going out now." And I did. I went to the mall for 45mins and bought a milkshake and socks I wouldn't need if I'd just do my laundry, because I decided that if wearing clean socks tomorrow was going to make me feel less depressed, it was worth the $. So if you count a cake batter flavored milkshake as a meal, I ate 2x today, I got dressed in clothes that make me feel good, I was briefly outside during the 1 block roll to the mall each way, and now I'm writing this dribble, because even if no one cares, writing is therapeutic for me. So I did 4 things today even if it took until 8pm to do them. That's more then I used to do, an improvement. Proof that I've learned something from WRAP even if the one I wrote has been lost for like forever and I never wrote a new one. :D Props to me!
What do you do when you're depressed? Because no one really answered me last time...