You Know You Have CP When...

So I was getting a massage this morning, which is a regular thing now that I've found steady (part-time) employment. Something I'm insecure about, only because I feel like most people don't understand that I've lived with a chronic pain condition my whole life, and if I mention it I feel like they'll delegate me to the category of "spoiled," which is not what this is about.

But that's neither here nor there. I'm probably in the minority of massage goers in that I can't imagine myself ever falling asleep. I find myself too interesting, I guess you could say. I like to pay attention to what hurts how much. It's useful to know. If a problem area hasn't been bothering me and it hurts less then usual, it's nice confirmation. If it hurts just as much, I wonder what's going on. I also think I'm in the minority of massage goers in that even as a kid I paid attention to orthopedists and physical therapists, and I took anatomy and physiology both senior year of high school and sophomore year of college, so I have a decent understanding of what muscles are where. I generally know what she's working on, even if I don't remember the names of 100% of the muscles.

Often, like this morning, when something is particularly painful, I'll go "What's that?" I couldn't quite tell if she was working on my lower back or the top of my pelvis, which is kind of the same thing, but it was something she hadn't worked on before. I could tell she was right at the insertion point of whatever it was.

To get to the punch line of this story, she says "your glutes and your hip rotators." And the only thing I could think of in my head was "If this hurts that much, I've gotta have a firm ass. At least I won't be like 80 years old and have a saggy butt. Score one for spasticity!"

LOL...